Still confused after 15 years

I've had fifteen years of testing, using drops, questioning, reading and talking to many specialists only to feel that noone is really listening, and are confusing me even more. No one seems to know what the ideal pressure for me is , for ten years it was 20-22 , now even when it is 19 I'm told its not low enough. I've had SLT with minimum effect, I take my IOP at my Optometrist when I'm relaxed and its 13-16. I'm 45 years old .